Thursday 2 December 2010

Phase One, Part One

Right, I'll cut to the chase from now on. I've begun the very first bit of the plans, to get his attention, it went like this...

Items:

  • One [1] spade taken from Dead-Cat-Man's garden.                      (That just died by the way.)
  • Tons [shitloads] of rope and string.
  • Black bin bags [this isn't working so well].
  • Two [2] rolls of duct tape.
  • One [1] big knife.
  • One [1] large tree growing precariously close to a drop.


Procedure:

  1. Dig around base of tree. Prolly not a beech tree like, he just fills in gaps in his knowledge with whatever. Thats for another time. Yeah so dig around base of tree. Dig as far as you can for as long as you can.
  2. Take out knife and carve away at it until you have the shape of a face. Knife snaps and you just have to use whatevers left.
  3. Fill bags with stone and soil. Don't give up halfway through! Fill all the bags.
  4. Tie ropes around bags, apply duct tape for extra security. 
  5. Now tie ropes around the tree.
  6. Haul bags off edge. Tree falls into water below.
Results:
It stops snowing. It starts to rain.

6 comments:

  1. Oh? I don't mind it really.

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  2. You said you needed to talk to me about something?

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  3. Hey, look, earlier I was a bit gung-ho about the whole thing. You're okay, you look like you've got a plan, thats good. I might just be diverting his attention anyway, if we're agreed there is only one of the bugger.

    I've read through your blog, seen your dream. The one in the forest with the too tall trees. I think I've seen the same place. I always figured it was some place he liked in Scotland, but since most of you are from across the pond, it must be there. If it's anywhere at all.

    The only way I know to stop reoccurring dreams is to break a pattern in your life, sleep at a different time (but still sleep for the same amount of time), eat different, like eat something Chinese if you never do, or wear different colours. Seriously.

    I can't promise you where else you'll end up though.

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  4. Thanks. Luckily it seems like I've broken the pattern though. What I mean is, last night I didn't dream at all, which is a significant improvement. Also, the forest in my dream... I think it might have been something to do with Slender Man having a hard time finding me, which would explain why they later were all cut down right before he ended up appearing in real life. I read something about wood obstructing his view... I don't know. Well, thanks for the advice anyway. If I do start having a reoccurring dream again I'll use your advice.

    thanks,
    Raz P.

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  5. Don't worry about it. Have a nice day. Stop by...well, see you next time.

    ReplyDelete